Kids; Bespoke Troublemakers since birth

“Ma, I love you,” Rehaan said to me while pooping.

I looked up from the sink where I was washing Azaan's underwear.

Wondering where this sudden love for mother came from, I looked at him with scepticism written all over my face. My brow arched and mouth curled a bit did not waver his expression.

He was looking at me with the same gravity that he carries while looking at the phone screen, watching his favourite car videos. That was from where he learnt all the means of transport, colours, water animals and wild animals.

“Okay, Rehaan. I too love you, son.” I had had my brow raised in confusion, and he went back to pooping.

For a boy of 3 years and ten months ago, he was pretty active. Jumping around in the whole house, playing pranks with a cousin, irritating everyone with his consistent rambling and leapfrog, basically being a nuisance, were some Rehaan's most favourite things to do.

And when he would ask for permission to go to the loo to either poop or pee, his face always held the expression that suggested that no kid of his age could ever be as serious as he is.

The icing on the cake being, his attitude when he is not a headache; he would act like all grown up. A man. With rules, principles and abiding by the same. He would have this aura of intellect around him that surprised Gautam and me all the same. Even more interesting would be watching him watch movies. Lying on his belly, hands around his face and eyes on the screen. Unabated, undivided, unperturbed attention.

Makes both of us parents wonder what kind of a kid exactly he is.

And then there is Azaan. My younger one. Two years and six months. Smart for his age, naughty that eventually matched his brother's level, a brain that finally began to make its presence known when he started copying dance steps and tune of songs.

Azaan is one masterpiece. Undoubtedly so is Rehaan. A kid who has only learnt to say 'mama', 'papa', 'dada' and 'Bhai' explains what he wants, with his expressions is both priceless and amusing. He likes to eat. And he likes to sleep. These two things are such he can do anytime, anywhere. Since he is yet to be potty trained, his diapers are mostly soiled. So far he knows everything mentioned in his alphabet book and number book. He knows how to do 'ha-ha-ha' when I say 'Open your mouth’.

And the way their fights take place? THAT is pure entertainment. Rehaan, being a jerk of a brother, would snatch something Azaan is eating and Azaan would retaliate. First, by crying at the top of his lungs, and then, slapping the elder one. And then another slap from elder one to the younger and then the younger one strikes again. And it goes on for quite a while and is apparently, fun. Though my mother in law asks me to step in, I, being me, refrain from stepping between them. Moreover, I would never want to miss the opportunity to watch them defend themselves and attack while being extra cautious as not severely to hurt each other.

Now what surprises me the most about my two little devils is how they have bonded with each other in these two years. How they started playing together, how they fight not only with each other but also for each other. How one would laugh when the other is being scolded, how the duo would sleep after being threatened to be left with the watchman (that works, really).

I slap Azaan, and he will laugh and jump as though he has been loved. And it’s different in the case of Rehaan. Rehaan would look at me with a hand on his cheek silently observing me. And the questions follow: Ma, are you angry with me? Am I a bad boy? Do you not love me? Ma, will you talk with me?

I am left absolutely stumped each time he asks me these questions. Right questions at the exact right time, and how in the hell aware these kids are!

What I do as a mother is nothing special, is nothing new. Every mother does these things, experience kids' tantrums, manage them, feed them and keep them warm when it’s cold.

But what I have learnt about myself while tending to my young ones is that a person can love so much that if their loved one is injured or ill or unwell, they will give up everything to make them right, healthy and happy again. I learnt that I could give my life to better theirs… I discovered that I too could have the patience that matched my own mum’s. I learnt that I could give up my night’s sleep to sponge my ailing son. I learnt that educating them in the best possible way is one of those things which I would never be tired of doing.

I learnt to be a better version of myself; with them, I learnt to appreciate myself as an individual.

To talk about kids, kids are, were and will always be, a pain in the ass.